


Holmes and Watson have a weird day

by ShinerWrites



Series: Fantastic Crossover Crack [3]
Category: Music RPF, Professional Wrestling, Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms, Super Mario & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Body Modification, Burger King - Freeform, Cheating, Confused John Watson, Crack, Established Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, F/M, I have no shame, M/M, Masturbation, Multi, Public Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Sex, Sibling Incest, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, What Have I Done, bizarre crossovers, i think, i'll regret this i know it, maybe? - Freeform, sorry - Freeform, what is this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-26 23:27:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20397892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShinerWrites/pseuds/ShinerWrites
Summary: Pure Crack. Sherlock and his trusty companion are having their weirdest day yet.





	Holmes and Watson have a weird day

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance. Please leave a comment, they make my day :)

It was a weird day for Sherlock and his trusty assistant and friend Watson. They had just gotten done fucking in a bush, when they heard the sound of a tractor driving by. 

“Hey laddies!” A gruff man shouted at the two men, “I’m trying to get to my next wrestling match, so would ya stop… distracting me?”

“John Cena?” Watson immediately recognized for no reason in particular.

John shrugged and led them into a nearby warehouse. In the middle of the warehouse was a glowing portal, which seemed to be emanating moans and a smell of orange chicken.

“What ever is this obscene work of magic?” Holmes said with disgust.

“Jump on in and you’ll see,” John Cena said with a wink.

Watson shrugged and dove head first into the portal. 

“I can deduce that this will pose no danger to us,” Holmes said before following his companion/fuck buddy.

Watson face planted and broke his nose, bleeding violently. Holmes was no better off.

“It seems my calculations were off,” Holmes said with a shake in his voice. But then he took notice of where he was.

Pink clouds in the sky, endless grass and paths made up this land. Along with a bunch of buildings which seemed to consist of nothing but burger king.

But the most striking of all, was people everywhere, just having sex. Like. Everyone was having sex.

And the men had breasts. Holmes and Watson looked down at themselves only to find that they had boobs as well. Watson touched one experimentally.

“What the bloody hell?”

Soon, John Cena fell from the sky and landed next to them, breaking his nose, “you get used to the broken nose. And the boobs.”

Then, unexpectedly, Mario and his trusty companion Luigi fell from the clouds.

They broke their noses, but were then overcome with lust, and started making out.

Holmes made a face at the two, “aren’t you brothers?”

Mario and Luigi simply exclaimed “Alabama 100, paisano.”

Holmes and Watson watched the two making out in scandalized disgust.

John Cena let out a cry, “Shakira!”

Shakira looked up from her intense sex and ran to John Cena. “John!! It’s been ages!! How’ve you been?”

“Good, baby,” John said with a seductive look.

Shakira looked at John Cena with hearts in her eyes, “oh, Mr. Cena, I want to fondle your breasts!”

“What the actual fuck is going on?” Watson said in utter confusion. 

Shakira and John Cena begin undressing each other while Holmes watched, masturbating furiously.

“Boy, I could go for a burger about now,” Watson proclaimed awkwardly, “bye!”

Watson ran off to a Burger King.

Inside that very Burger King, Katy Perry was running the cash register.

"Hello, madame," Watson said, flirting with her instantly, but talking to her boobs.

Katy smiled, "what would you like."

"Tits," he replied, and Katy Perry acted like nothing was happening.

Katy then proceeded to jump Watson.

As they made out in the middle of the Burger King, Holmes walked in on them.

"Watson! How dare you cheat on me this way!"

"But she's on my list!" Watson exclaimed.

"I never liked the list, anyways!" Holmes yelled, "full of boring people."

Katy looked at him, "you can join if you'd like."

Holmes looked away with a grumble.

Katy and Watson proceeded to teasingly fondle their boobs, until Holmes gave in with a sigh.

"Fine."

The three of them then began to have a Mayonnaise-covered threesome, until John Cena burst in, "Katy! You've been cheating on me with these two!?"

Watson gasped, "John Cena!"

John Cena glared at the three of them, "cheaters!"

"Oh but I saw you making out with Shakira!" Holmes accused.

Katy glared at John Cena, "is this true??"

Shakira walked in at that very moment, "Cena! You've been two-timing me?"

Shakira slapped John Cena.

There was a moment of awkward silence.

John Cena looked around awkwardly, "uhhh... fivesome?"

Watson shrugged, "yeah, okay."

Sherlock, Katy Perry, and Shakira agreed with a nod of their heads.

The five of them began to have a lot of sex.

Suddenly, Mario, who was sitting on a table and jacking off, cut in, "y'know, this is exactly what happened when Peach found out I was cheating on her with Luigi."

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah... sorry.
> 
> This now has a prequel that has nothing to do with it called “Steve’s Clues.”


End file.
